This was written by my friend Mike Arst, a very clever man whom I’ve entreated for years to start a weblog.
iStatements
In honor of the release of Apple’s new iPhone, which I just can’t seem to want (even though I know I should want it), today several new product names occurred to me. Having decided that I probably can’t sell them for a small fortune on eBay (iBay?), I have decided to pass them along to you instead. No charge, even.
This for someone who drops his little MP3 player: the iBroke
For folks who enjoy listening to music while they’re eating their favorite Vietnamese soup: the iPho
For workshops that are all about one’s self-esteem: the iMe
(If they’re conducted in French: the iMoi)
For people who developed a bit too much self-esteem at the workshops (and/or for people who love odd-looking little jungle prosimians): the iI
For people like me who are just plain slow, and proud of it: the iPlod
For people who hate settling for less: the iMore
Then again, for folks in the simpler-living movement: the iLess [contributed by co-worker]
For people who loved “Young Frankenstein”: the iGor
For the lonely fisherman in his boat: the iCod
For the local crows who wake us up every morning: the iCawed
For our infamous bad-tempered cat, of whom many people are justifiably terrified: the iClawed [also contributed by co-worker]
For guys who had too much to drink and got rude at a party: the iPawed
(The individual who behaves this way is the iClod)
For the ladies who had to put up (but only briefly) with such rudeness: the iSlap
(Could substitute the iClawed there)
And last but not least, a product for the marketing people who have managed with great success to persuade us [I plead guilty] that we need all this electronic stuff:
The iCon
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