Author: Russell Shaw (page 2 of 10)

by Russell Shaw

Mega-Producing Realtor

Author website

It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then — just to loosen up.

Inevitably, though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.I began to think alone — “to relax,” I told myself — but I knew it wasn’t true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.

That was when things began to sour at home. One evening I turned off the TV and asked my wife about the meaning of life. She spent that night at her mother’s.I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment don’t mix, but I couldn’t help myself.

I began to avoid friends at lunchtime so I could read Thoreau, Muir, Confucius and Kafka. I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, “What is it exactly we are doing here?”One day the boss called me in. He said, “Listen, I like you, and it hurts me to say this, but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don’t stop thinking on the job, you’ll have to find another job.”

This gave me a lot to think about. I came home early after my conversation with the boss. “Honey,” I confessed, “I’ve been thinking…””I know you’ve been thinking,” she said, “and I want a divorce!”

“But Honey, surely it’s not that serious.” “It is serious,” she said, lower lip aquiver.”You think as much as college professors and college professors don’t make any money, so if you keep on thinking, we won’t have any money!”

“That’s a faulty syllogism,” I said impatiently.She exploded in tears of rage and frustration, but I was in no mood to deal with the emotional drama.

“I’m going to the library,” I snarled as I stomped out the door.I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche. I roared into the parking lot with NPR on the radio and ran up to the big glass doors.

They didn’t open. The library was closed.To this day, I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that Read more

by Russell Shaw

Mega-Producing Realtor

Author website

To: All Past, Present and Future Bloodhoundblog Contributers and Readers, who shall be referred to as “BHB Friends” or “BHBF” for the purpose of this document. This an Official Russell Shaw Non-Denominational,
Holiday Greeting.

Dear Sirs, Madames and respective families, this non-transferable greeting is extended solely for the purpose of creating a feeling of “Joy” and general well being. The afore mentioned “feeling” may be enjoyed by BHBF and their respective “families” at the BHBF’s sole and absolute discretion on or about sundown on the 24th of December 2007 until, on or about sundown on December 26th 2007.

Furthermore this “feeling” is not in any way being extended for any other days including but not limited to; New Years, day or eve, Valentines Day, Easter, Labor Day, The 4th of July, Ground Hogs Day, Memorial Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, any and all religious and or ethnic holidays and or any day weather it be known or unknown that may arise out of any day be it celebratory or just an ordinary day. On said day the afore mentioned group of “BHBF”may refer to Russell Shaw only in reference to said holiday greeting.  This “greeting” is in no way an endorsement of any current or future posts on this or any other blog, or any other business that the “BHBFs” may be involved in at this time or in the future.

Any and all questions or comments arising out of this “Greeting’ should be forwarded to Russell Shaw’s statutory agent, per Russell Shaw’s incorporating documents on file with the Arizona Corporation Commission located in Phoenix, Arizona, for name and address of said agent.

Warmly,

Russell Shaw

P.S. Merry Christmas Everyone!

(I stole this entire idea from my friend, Mad Coyote Joe)