Kibble and Bits

by Kris Berg

Realtor, Associate Broker

Author website

KIBBLE

Odysseus, meet Simon. Tell me, can you really teach an old dog new tricks?

Odysseus is our resident cover boy, a Bloodhound, described as a large, powerful dog tireless in his keen pursuit of a scent. Simon is a Golden Retriever, my family pet, or as we like to call him, the world’s dumbest dog. Goldens are a friendly and people-loving breed valued for their high level of socialability, yet they make poor watchdogs.

Astute and inquisitive versus dumb-as-dirt and lovable – You make the call.

BITS

Agents, as I see it, generally fall into the Bloodhound or Golden categories. I can’t speak personally for Odysseus, but I know Simon all too well.

• Puppy Agent: Fresh out of their Principles class and newly armed with a License to Sell, these agents attend the mandatory company obedience school. They quickly learn to perform rote tasks, such as announcing their new and exciting career to all of the people in their Sphere of Influence, sending letters to Expired Listings, dropping notepads at the doors of the neighbors, and shoving business cards in the hands of unsuspecting waitresses. Puppy Golden: I did my “business” where they told me to. I’m a Good Boy!
• The Programmed Agent: You know him. He is the one that spends all of his business development time sitting in costly training classes in search of the “answer”. He is the first in line to purchase the costly books and cassettes which will reveal the “secrets”. While he is being coached and trained and recoached and retrained, others around him are building actual businesses and establishing successful careers. The Programmed Golden: Look! Another tail to chase! I bet I catch this one!
• Myopic Agent: A conversation was related to me in which the broker of a small, local real estate firm said, in reference to our blog, “I could have a blog, but I prefer to spend my time serving my clients. Meanwhile, at the office holiday party, I was chatting with two veteran agents about the latest Zillow news to learn that neither had ever heard of Zillow. Myopic Golden: My snout is stuck in this soup can, and I can’t see what’s coming or going, but I am having a blast!
• Unmotivated Agent: An agent approached Steve a couple of weeks ago, bragging about her new ePro designation. She explained how part of her homework involved identifying other agent websites that were good and worth emulating. “I picked yours and Kris’, but I just don’t know much about that stuff, I’m too old to learn and can’t afford a to pay someone to create a really good one”. (By the way, she never bothered to ask how or how much). Unmotivated Golden: I would really like those leftovers on the counter top, but I’m not sure I can jump that high. I’ll just stay here and sleep on the couch.
• Unadaptable Agent: A lot of agents made a lot of money since the late nineties through no fault of their own. As the market got more challenging, their bus bench and shopping cart ad expenditures just didn’t continue to “produce” the same, desired results. These agents will now see the need to double their efforts, which will involve double the bus bench and shopping cart ads. Unadaptable Golden: I just swallowed a rock, and I then I threw up the rock. I think I will go eat another rock!
• Agent Without a Business Plan: In October, a local agent confided that, with the slower market and his declining business, he would be “sitting back” until the end of the year. “I really should be marketing, but that has never been my model. I may start doing some marketing in January”. This particular agent happened to enter the market during the last years of fevered buying and selling, and derived the majority of his business from friends on the soccer field. Of course, once all of the social connections were snuggly tucked into their new homes, there was nothing left on the immediate horizon. Golden Without a Business Plan: I am going to sit by the front door for the next three days waiting for the Pizza Man. He showed up on Tuesday and, even though I smell pot roast in the oven, I’m sure he’s coming any second!
• The Reactive Agent: Most of the agents I know, unfortunately, fall into this category. They don’t study the market or the trends, they don’t read the news, and they don’t know they whether they are in an up or down or improving or declining market until it hits them broadside. This, of course, can have disastrous results. The Reactive Golden: The doorbell! Who could it be? Charles Manson or the Pizza Man? Let’s go find out!
• Delusional Agent: What Internet revolution? And, where did those Redfin guys come from? Delusional Golden: That cat, the one that has been living in my house and eating my food for the past five years, when did he get here?

Which breed will succeed in the next decade of real estate remains to be seen. As much as I love my dumb, lovable, 100-pound puppy, my money is on the Bloodhound.