It’s Saturday, which means it’s my Sunday, which means it’s my one day off if I’m lucky. This last month has been the busiest I have seen this year. The choices of my clients, both on the buying and listing side have seemed more challenging now than I have ever seen. Well, that’s not entirely true, many buyers have had no problem sitting on the fence. On top of that, the opportunities that have been presented to me have be overly scrutinized this week. I was out to dinner last night with some guests from out of town when it hit me. The stress and lack of sleep has had me going around acting somewhat zombie like, I literally responded to the Maitre d‘s question of “how are you this evening?” with a “nnnnyaeh”. The obviousness of my failing condition was now as apparent as the gibberish expelled from my throat.
Now before this comes across an absolute whining session for me to vent off the frustrations of my life at the moment, let me tell you that I have the tools to navigate rough waters. I’ve been here before, as we all have. The bumps along the way keep it interesting if nothing else, right? The unpredictable events the follow poor decision making are ones that can be reversed or taken into a more positive direction given the awareness of the direction of said bonehead moves. I’ve never thought that it was helpful to beat one’s self up over what could be a mistake. What I do feel is negligible is witnessing someone (or yourself) having the awareness of a mistake and keeping that action on the same path. This, a good friend of mine would say is like sticking your head in the oven only to find that it’s too hot for a head, and then going back again the next day to try it again and still find it’s still too warm…. though I could never figure out why somebody wanted stick their head the oven, the lesson was not lost on me.
Simplicity is always my best fix. Making simple adjustments to straighten my seemingly wrecked passage into a doomsday scenario. Writing things out helps, weighing out positive and negative aspects. Reaching out to peers and talking things out can give orderly direction, provided others are not fragrant of the smell of fresh burned hair themselves. Many exercise, for this I put forth my best effort, despite my aversion of the gym and Yoga has been good to me. The fix for today is Rock-n-Roll. Good ol’ therapy in itself can be blowing off the dust of some highway poetry like Son Volt’s Trace, opening up the sunroof and hitting the Shoreline drive. Being a California native and a nomad at heart the road has always been a good place for clearing cobwebs, and yes, the epiphany was right there in the sounds:
If living right is easy, what goes wrong You're causing it to drown Didn't want to turn that way You're causing it to drown Doesn't make a difference now You're causing it to drown Silence knows, can't drown a heart Son Volt/Jay Farrar is the source \"Drown\"
I’m sure taking next Saturday .. and maybe even this Wednesday afternoon off wouldn’t hurt either.
Any other tips on challenging the ingrained Protestant work ethic are welcomed below. 🙂
Louis Cammarosano says:
Brad
Sometimes what helps me is talking to people outside your safe circle. There you find different and sometimes better perspectives…..
August 23, 2008 — 8:25 pm
Teri Lussier says:
The open road is good.
I don’t know if it’s what Louis was talking about “outside your safe circle” but I love to talk with someone who will kick my ass. Someone who will tell me the ugly truth, knowing that it’s what is best for me, and knowing that the truth might put the relationship in jeopardy, but ultimately knowing that what they are telling me is what I need to hear regardless of whether I want to hear it. That is a real friend, hard to find, but neccessary and liberating.
Simplicity rocks. Maybe it’s me, but cleaning is a great way to be productive and change the scenery all at the same time. It’s one of those tasks that forces the mind to do something focused but different, freeing it up to subconsciously work out problems. If it’s major cleaning, or painting, then we are adding a physical workout as well. It works for me on many levels, but then again, I’m not so good at “vacations”. 😉
August 24, 2008 — 8:47 am
Brad Coy says:
Louis
Thanks. I believe in seeking counsel with those that understand as I do, the hire truths are what’s important as opposed to a band-aid fix.
Teri
It’s funny you should mention getting involved in a task. For many years I worked with my hands as a bike mechanic growing up, and again as a contractor in my 20’s. This past week I’ve felt a real yearning for doing work with my hands and my back yard is plum ripe for an overhaul. Seeing your Brick Ranch post with Andy Goldsworthy got me thinking about this as well. The creative relationship between our hands and mind can be Zen. On vacations. A couple of months back Ginger and I took a Saturday and just traveled near by. It was like taking some real time off and detaching.
This is what I’m talking about. Just the disengagement of being “in the rut” as people say. Or, changing up the scenery. I consider myself to be really self-aware… I guess it just shook me to find myself going around with blinders on all of a sudden. Damn thing about life lessons, is most of the times we need to keep revisiting them again.
August 24, 2008 — 12:46 pm
Louis Cammarosano says:
Teri
That’s what I was getting at. Sometimes your friends can tell you the ugly truth. However, sometimes because your close circle of friends is too close, they don’t see it themselves and could not tell you even if they wanted to. That’s why I say seek counsel outside.
August 24, 2008 — 1:32 pm
Jeff Brown says:
What’s been a boon to me has been my daily sojourns into the womb-like embrace of the afternoon Black Abyss. It can be anywhere. For me, it’s my local S’bucks. I arrive sans cell or laptop, carrying my latest mindless fiction. While allowing the fiction to carry me away, I’m drinkin’ my coffee and eatin’ my oatmeal raisin cookie.
I’m thinkin’ it’s akin to takin’ a nap.
Still, when my head arrives where yours is, I pick a friend or relative and tell them to get out the scalpel. Sometimes the observations they offer remind me of why Homer says, Doh!!
August 25, 2008 — 11:32 am
Brad Coy says:
Good call Jeff. That reminds me of one of my favorite mid-day meditations, a walk. I’m almost always smack dab in the middle of a beautiful neighborhood on any given day. Getting out for an 20 minute walk can be the difference between boiling point and relaxation.
Taking a stroll and getting involved outside of yourself is the perfect remedy for self-absorption.
August 25, 2008 — 11:55 am