There’s always something to howl about.

Muggles Would Die Without The WWW

World Wide Web Internet Crash Fatal ErrorBear with me as I add this up…

Internet meltdown at Fry’s
+ Dalton’s print media article
+ Greg’s article about books
+ An Onion video parody
= We muggles (in honor of midnight’s Harry Potter release) are overly dependent on the Internet!

So first, I must note that while at Fry’s Electronics yesterday, we waited in a line that dwarfed the lines on December 24th. The holdup? The Internet was down and they couldn’t process any payments. Seriously. Of course even checks have to be scanned and Lord knows no one in a tech store has cash! So, we waited for nearly 45 minutes.

While in line, we started talking to the guy behind us about what the hell we would do in our own lives if we didn’t have the Internet…

What if your PDA/Treo/iPhone/Blackberry wouldn’t turn on in the morning? Do you know anyone’s numbers? I don’t even know my mom’s number!!! Would you know what appointments you were supposed to make that day?

How would you use the MLS? How would you know inventory? How would you effectively get your news? There is no “real estate channel.” How would you suddenly market to an audience used to clicking on Google an average 127.2 times a day?

What happens if you don’t know the definition of a word? How could you possibly explain to your children that before dictionary.com they actually published a print format containing definitions and they’ll have to dust off the book printed by dinosaurs and quit asking me what “vociferous” means.

Would you be able to live without texting? I know my kids would scratch their eyes out if they didn’t have their cell phones, MySpace, Facebook or email. Would you be able to go without a blog? Who would know about your thoughts, beliefs, rants or LOL Cats?

What if The Internet crashed? Who would restore The Internet? Is there a Ctrl + Alt + Delete (or a paper clip to the reset button if you’re a MacHipster) for The Internet?

This was the conversation at Fry’s yesterday, then today we stumbled upon the Onion Video parody of news coverage of The Crash (which theoretically I wouldn’t receive since I have digital cable)!

Breaking News: All Online Data Lost After Internet Crash

Dalton and Swann catalogue the death of print media and books (that I agree with). We have already traded print for an Internet platform. It leaves me to wonder WWWD? That’s “What Would We Do” for y’all slow folks. Is it even possible for The Internet to flake on us? Even if only for a few moments, my world would be completely upside down.

I have an English degree, but books are for chumps (or for people who have the attention span longer than a toddler… which I don’t… wait, what was I saying?). WWWD? We’d probably have a simultaneous, major hissy fit.