In my late twenties, as a trader on the floor of the options exchange, I was a “Master of the Universe”. That’s a very common affliction down there. Apparently, when you put a bunch of young, fearless, risk-takers together and give them the power to move markets around the world, you end up with a bit of a monster. At one point I attended a symposium with my fellow traders; each of us secure in our status as Cowboy and Superman rolled into one very special gift for the world. We listened to the latest market analysis systems and celebrated our shared royalty. Amidst all the revelry was a speaker who didn’t have a financial background; he was more of a self-help, motivational kind of guy. (Believe me, the last thing that group needed was motivation!) I remember not paying much attention to him – you know, being a “Master of the Universe” and all – but I wish I had. He wasn’t there to motivate us, he was there to help us – to keep us from losing ourselves… an effort made mostly in vain.
Within days of the symposium all was blissfully forgotten; let’s face it, what could these talking heads possibly teach a “Master of the Universe?” All, I should say, but this bit of wisdom from the self-help guru – the one who was so out of place. This stuck with me and I damned him for it:
If you want to know who you really are, listen to that quiet voice you hear while driving home after a meeting, late at night and tired, with no one else in the car and the radio off. That voice is who you really are… and the fears that voice brings forth are what you really fear.
Over time I was pretty sure I understood what he meant… but I didn’t.
I was thinking about this the other day. I had just finished with a group of agents in my POPs Program, where we had been favorably comparing the stress AND the fun of being an options trader with that of being a real estate agent. While driving home afterward, I was listening to that little voice and it hit me: I realized that my innermost fears are not really fears at all.
They’re a reflection – deep down inside – of my belief about what I do and do not deserve.
So, for instance, if you find that during those quietest of moments, when you listen to the little voice, you are fearful of never having enough money, it’s because deep down inside there’s a part of you that doesn’t believe you deserve wealth. In the same way if you fear unhappiness or things that make you unhappy, it’s because somewhere in there you don’t believe you deserve happiness. Our quietest, deepest fears are really sign-posts to our belief systems… and this is great news!
Understanding this, we can rid ourselves of these fears. Just the act of listening and understanding what fear is goes a long way toward that goal: “Fear flees from the light of understanding.” But we can do more; we can take an easy, positive step by simply writing a statement of affirmation and reading it every morning. Read it with conviction and without fail. Never underestimate the power of consistency. Water running over a rock appears to have little affect, but water running over a rock over time, is the Grand Canyon! So, if your fear concerns scarcity and you realize that a part of you believes you don’t deserve wealth, simply write a statement of affirmation: “I am a successful and good person deserving of wealth.” Read this every morning with conviction (that’s the real trick here) and sooner than you think you will overwrite the belief. It is just that simple. (Of course, there’s a good chance those fears will be replaced by some new and different fears… but that’s a story for another post!)
In the field of real estate, your beliefs about yourself are just as important to your ultimate success as your knowledge and expertise. Listen to that little voice and face your fears. Not only will this open the door to a flourishing career, it will lead to a greater understanding of who you are… and why each of us is truly a “Master of the Universe.”
Ken brand says:
Amen Brother. Great post, perhaps piercing the beating heart of the beginning, middle and unfolding journey to success. Thanks.
February 16, 2010 — 3:09 pm
Teri Lussier says:
So beautiful, Sean.
You told me this: “Fear flees from the light of understanding” last year when my daughter was in the hospital, and we had no idea what the future held. All I was feeling at that time was fear, horrible, nearly debilitating fear. That idea is what I held onto, Sean. My fear itself was inhibiting me from providing help to my daughter, and once I recognized it, put a name on the fear, it dissipated. Shining a light into that darkness was key to getting through and past it. If I never thanked you for that, let me thank you now. Those words have helped me more than you will ever know.
February 17, 2010 — 7:37 am